I Don't Care
by NothingGoesAsPlanned
Summary: Sometimes, people don't realize how cruel they are. And other times, people don't know when to give up. Kendall/Logan, James/Carlos, and slight Kendall/Jo.


They look so perfect together, so no one notices how _not_ perfect they are, Logan realizes.

"I love you," He says, and Kendall only blinks at him slowly.

"Yeah, I know." He responds, and doesn't bother adding anything else.

...

The pool is relatively empty, but James doesn't care. He prefers it this way. It's prime tanning time, and there's no way in hell he'd let someone interrupt his tanning.

Carlos sits next to him, and James doesn't react. Because for some reason, Carlos is quiet. And a quiet Carlos makes it easier for James to pretend he's not there as opposed to a loud Carlos, who would be plain impossible to ignore.

"I have a crush on you." Carlos blurts out suddenly. James slides his sunglasses off and fixes the other boy with a blank look.

"Cool." He says, and that's the end of their conversation.

It's prime tanning time, after all.

...

"Fuck you." Logan says, eyes glassy and arms crossed. "Fuck you, fuck you, and _fuck you_."

Kendall only rolls his eyes and goes to close the door.

"Is that the only thing you know how to say?" He asks dryly, and the door slams in Logan's face.

…

Carlos is at the studio, and James is lazing around, because it's one of those days where he just doesn't feel like doing anything. He's walking aimlessly around the apartment, ignoring the fuming Logan and not bothering with Kendall, who's still locked in his room.

His phone buzzes, so he pulls it out and reads the text.

_Gustavo wants you in the studio. He says he wants to work with the two of us :)__,_ Carlos says.

_Yeah, okay_, James replies, and never shows up.

…

"I'm scared I'll fall out of love with you." Logan says the day after their fight (he's honestly forgotten what it had been about…they have too many fights to keep track of). He's debating whether he should switch out love for like, but falling out of like sounds weird so he just leaves it.

Kendall doesn't respond at first. He runs his hands down Logan's back, stopping at his hips and tilting his head up to nip at Logan's jaw.

"You won't." He says, sounding annoyed.

…

Gustavo's pissed. But he's always pissed, so James isn't as scared as he should be.

"Where were you? I needed you an hour ago!" Gustavo screams, face red and about to shoot out of his seat. Kelly lays her hand on his shoulder, but it doesn't seem to do anything.

James just shrugs and walks into the booth.

…

"You don't know that." Logan insists, moving his head away from Kendall. He groans, but doesn't respond. His head follows Logan, lips pressing against his neck. "Feelings always change. I mean I might not _want_ them too, but it could happen."

"It's not going to happen." Kendall growls, nipping at the pale neck in his reach. "So just shut up."

Logan slides out of Kendall's lap.

…

"You're done for the day." Gustavo says, and James knows that's Gustavo's way of saying he did a great job. "But you better not come into my studio late again."

James nods and heads back to the Palm Woods. Carlos is sitting on the couch in 2J, looking a little hurt.

"Hey," He says, and James doesn't bother looking at him.

"Hey." He heads into their bedroom and locks the door behind him.

…

"Do you even care about how I feel?" Logan whispers, sounding so hurt. Kendall arches an eyebrow, looking somewhat confused.

"Am I supposed to?" He asks, and Logan wonders if anyone else can hear the sound of his heart breaking.

…

Carlos knows that James hasn't exactly returned his feelings. But that's okay, because he's James, and James always gives his admirers an answer.

Except for him, of course.

James just keeps strutting around, smiling and flirting and ignoring Carlos.

It should be enough for Carlos to stop liking him…but it's not.

…

Logan always wants to talk about feelings. He always wants to hug and kiss and cuddle, but Kendall doesn't want that. He just wants to be left alone, but Logan just won't get the hint.

Sometimes he wonders why he's in this relationship, but then he remembers. Logan's hot, and he doesn't want anyone else to have him. It's selfish, he knows that, but he doesn't care.

Because Logan's his, and that's all he wants.

…

James isn't doing it on _purpose_. Seriously, he's not. So he may not have giving Carlos a proper response. But that's alright, because Carlos can wait. There are so many girls near the pool right now, and James heads down there as soon as he can.

He feels like a jerk, but it's fine.

Carlos is alright with waiting.

…

No one knows.

That's the way Kendall wanted it. Only James and Carlos know, simply because they walked in on them making out one time. Their relationship is a secret, one that only four people know.

Kendall's okay with it.

Logan's _not_ okay with it.

He wants to be able to hold Kendall's hand, wants to be able to kiss him and hug him.

But Kendall doesn't want that, and knowing that leaves a sour taste in Logan's mouth.

…

James doesn't actually _like_ Carlos. But the smaller boy is pretty cute, and James has never been with a guy. And maybe it's just an experiment, but hey, Carlos won't care. Because Carlos wants him, so James using him is fine.

Carlos won't mind, he tells himself.

…

Logan loves him. Like seriously, one hundred and fifty percent loves him. But Kendall doesn't, and that becomes more than apparent when he hooks up with Jo and breaks up with him.

"We can still have sex, though." Kendall says, and Logan sneers in disgust.

"Fuck you." He snaps, and Kendall sighs.

They have sex that night.

…

Carlos knows this isn't healthy. But he loves James, and when you love someone you put up with them…right?

It sounds bad, but Carlos can't bring himself to stop.

Because he's in love, and everything is perfect, and Carlos will ruin everything if he says anything.

…

"Happy New Year!" Everyone shouts and there's an eruption of chatter and laughter.

"Happy New Year." Logan mutters, mostly to himself. He holds his cup out in front of him, and watches as James, Carlos, and Kendall do the same.

"To new beginnings." Carlos says, and Logan instantly looks over at Kendall.

"Yeah." The blonde agrees, and their cups bump against each other.

Logan exhales and brings his cup to his lips. Maybe this year, everything would go back to normal.

Months pass…and nothing changes.

…

Carlos dreams of when things were normal. Dreams of when they all were best friends and Kendall and Logan weren't hating each other or in a one-sided relationship. Dreams of when he and James had a normal friendship, without sex and feelings.

He dreams of when everything was okay.

…

"We're okay." Kendall says when they're all gathered in the living room. "All of us are okay."

No one agrees with him.

"Hm." Is all Logan says, and that's the only conversation they have for the entire day.

…

"I'm done." Carlos tells him, looking away and holding his arms close to himself.

"I thought you liked me." James says, voice sounding accusing.

"I did." Carlos says, and his word choice leaves a funny feeling in James' chest.

…

"So you're telling me you want nothing to do with me?" Kendall asks, eyebrows furrowed. Logan shakes his head.

"Don't put words in my mouth." He says. "I just want us to be friends again. Like how we were before…"

He trails off, but Kendall knows what he's talking about.

…

After Logan tells him it's over, Kendall breaks up with Jo. He's hurting, so he figures she should be hurting too. Her eyes well with tears and she demands to know why they're breaking up, but Kendall refuses to tell her.

What would he say, after all?

...

There are times Kendall loves being a teenager. He loves the feeling of carelessness and freedom, likes the feeling sticking up for himself and taking the path to adulthood. But other times, he hates it. Hates the feeling of responsibility and accounting for his actions, hates breaking Logan's heart and feeling Logan break his heart.

He shouldn't be this upset. It wasn't like he was the best boyfriend. But damn, it hurts like hell.

"Fuck you." He says suddenly. "Fuck you, man." He looks into Logan's soft brown eyes. Those same eyes harden, and Logan's voice is nothing but ice when he talks.

"Is that the only thing you know how to say?"

There's no door for Logan to slam in his face, but Kendall doesn't need it to know he's being mocked.

…

None of them expect it when it happens. One day, Gustavo's doing his usual kind of praising, and Kelly's beaming at them and telling them that their fourth album is going to be awesome. And the next, they're all grim faced.

"Griffin…" Kelly doesn't finish her sentence, but they all know.

"We're done." James says, and it's not a question.

Kelly nods once.

…

They're at the airport. They've just landed back in Minnesota. Mrs. Knight and Katie go to unload their things into the rental car, but Kendall hangs back with the boys.

"We'll keep in touch, right?" He asks, a small grin on his face. No one smiles back.

"Sure." James says, and they all exchange awkward hugs before going to their separate cars, with their separate families, and their separate lives.

None of them keep in touch.


End file.
